The G Spot

I know when I first heard the term I wondered, “why the hell is it called the g-spot? Is it because it’s the ‘good’ spot? I don’t get it.” The g-spot is named after good old Dr. Gräfenberg, the man who “discovered” it – much like Columbus “discovered” America – lots of people were already there and having a good time without some Western dude coming along to claim it.

It’s really the urethral sponge, where the Skene’s gland is located (the lady-version of the prostate) and the tissue that surrounds the urethra on the front side of the vagina. When it gets stimulated, it becomes engorged and most likely you’ll feel like you have to pee. That’s when you know you’re getting the right spot. You don’t really have to pee (unless you do….) – it’s just that the engorgement is stimulating the urethra and bladder.

It’s around one or two inches into the vagina, and the best way to begin stimulating it is with the “come here” finger curl. Hold the curl for a few seconds, then release for the same length. You can repeat this until it’s nice and stimulated. From there you can use a vibrator or dildo, or have someone’s fingers do whatever you want with it. It’s best to be aroused before beginning g-spot stimulation – if you start too early it can feel quite uncomfortable.

When it came into fashion, the g-spot was splashed over terrible magazine covers with article titles along the lines of, “COME LIKE YOU’VE NEVER COME BEFORE – NOW!!!!!!” Women were all supposed to love this magical spot, and the simple touch of it would leave us all acquivering from mind-blowing orgasms. My question is: why would the g-spot make us ALL come when we all differ so greatly on other parts of our body, and our preferences for anything, really? Some women love their belly buttons licked, some don’t. Some like anal sex, some don’t. Some like spicy food, some don’t. Some don’t want their clit directly stimulated and some want a vibe like a jackhammer right on it. The g-spot is just like all of these. You may like it, you may not. And even if you do like it, it doesn’t mean it’ll make you come. Let alone “NOW!!!!!!”.

When stimulating the g-spot, most women want clitoral stimulation as well. Some have described “g-spot orgasms” as feeling deeper and more all over their body. To me this sounds like it’s due to having more and different nerve endings being stimulated than just the clitoris. I don’t think this warrants a different orgasm name, because really, are any of them ever exactly the same? Clitoral and anal stimulation feels different than clitoral and intense nipple stimulation. I don’t think these all warrant different titles – they’re all different colours in the orgasm rainbow.

The atomization of erogenous zones doesn’t serve anything besides chopping our bodies into sexual and non-sexual fragments, leaving everyone just a little bit more distanced from the over-all body experience of sex. It’s great to explore and hear about others’ experiences, but not if you begin to think you’re not a real woman because you’re not having these purported explosive orgasms from certain stimulation. I’ve had women ask me why they don’t like g-spot stimulation, what was wrong with them. Sex isn’t about getting it “right”, and the bru-ha-ha over the g-spot has really brought this out.

The sum up of the g-spot is this: yeah, it can feel good, yeah, it can change the feeling of your orgasm, but if it doesn’t, no big whoop. You’re still a stone-cold fox.

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